Unexpected Wisdom Collector T-Shirts

'My best advice? Never miss an opportunity to pass water...'

"Son, it's time you learned the benefits of sitting around doing nothing."

Playdough's The Republic

"You say that using a colicky horse to pull you out of the mud may actually help his colic?"

"I guess one of the bunnies was a boy after all!"

'Where you went wrong' Desk.

'I don't care how smart you think you are, you're still a bird brain.'

A good executive is known by the company he keeps solvent.

'Did you bring any money? - Enlightenment doesn't grow on trees, you know!'

"Have you tried sitting in a box?"

"No, I don't have any weed."

'Except...That.'

young mother with a baby being bombarded by advice on parenting from older mothers

Trending wise.

"'Buy low, sell high', is all I've figured out so far. Now go away"

Abstract art proves that things can be as bad as they look.

'For best results, squeeze from the bottom.'

"Whoa, whoa, big guy with all your ‘meaning of life’ mumbo jumbo—I just want my kid to pick up her room."

'I have a B.A. in indifference, an M.A. in obstinacy and I'm currently working on my doctorate in defiance.'

'Any worldly advice?' 'Yep. Don't get up too quickly.'

'Take the advice of an old sea dog, Lad. Never provoke a fight with the phrase, 'You want a piece of me?''

'I didn't realize that enlightenment would be so BORING!'

Technological Advances and the Experience of Age.

'Cake philosophy'

'Why are you telling me all this? We don't need any more.'

W M. Beemers Adages

Hints for the Park.

'Ya know, my mom always said, 'you can catch more flies with hones than with vinegar'!'

Under new management. But still no bananas.

'The good news is that the rest of your day will seem wonderful compared to this.'

Doubt makes the mountain that faith can make disappear.

Rituals

'Making virtue its own reward isn't EITHER a cop-out!'

Life's toughest decision-when to start middle age.

'Granted, it may be a half truth, but it's got all the flavor of a full one, with only half the calories!'