Unexpected Wisdom Seeker T-Shirts

'My advice is to sell tech, buy acme cleaning supply. But what do I know? I'm just the cleaning lady here!'

"Feel free to take notes."

'He who laughs last probably doesn't get it.'

'Do you think that's wise?'

Road sign: 'No Passing Zone... This, too, shall pass.'

'He was just saying that all things come to him who waits and, sure enough, along came a lightning bolt.'

'Enlightenment isn't EITHER overrated!'

"O.K., O.K., people - we're not workshopping these, they're already set in stone."

"A journey of a thousand miles begins with a MAP, actually."

For some reason, "The Road Less Travelled" GPS package never really caught on...

"I don't know… Did you try Googling it?"

"But how do I accomplish that in 140 characters or less?"

"It's a long way to Enlightenment. You might need some cash."

"Life's a lottery - That's why you need balls"

"He's my smart-aleck twin."

"No, I don't want to live forever, but I damn sure don't want to be dead forever, either."

"Always take the bull firmly by the tail and look him directly in the eye..."

Beyond the known and the unknown.

'You must heal yourself.'

Middle Age: When you finally get your head together, and your body starts to fall apart!

"So have you ever stopped to ask yourself: If he really knew the secrets of the universe, would he be living in a damn cave?"

Caveman to kid: 'There's more to life than what you read on cave walls.'

FAQs.

'O mighty gods! - May you grant us food, clothing, and shelter, and the wisdom to know the difference.'

"Yes, three of a kind beats two pair."

"Yes, alright! I know it's a small mountain... I'm only a novice oracle."

"Smoke a cigar that fits your face."

"Look, if I had all the answers, would I be living alone on the top of a mountain?"

Man selling 'pearls of wisdom'.

"Don't you want to hear about the day I had?"

'You're in luck. Business ethics is a gray area.'

"I might have to go to school forever because the more I know the more I know I don't know."

"Wow, Jesus. That lesson rocked, someone should write this stuff down."

'This course in philosophy is not designed to teach you how to make a living. I will be teaching you how to make a life.'

"Really? a frikkin' math question?"