Unexpected Talents Pillows

'All I've ever wanted to do is dance!'

'Now that I have your attention...'

"I invited a few friends over who think you should see a psychiatrist."

Giraffe Portrait

'Hey guys?. . . Help us think what Dale could do for his '15 minutes of fame.''

Congratulations! - You have been nominated for the Turner Prize...

"Ok, maybe a surprise party wasn't the best idea."

Musical Prodigy

'You said you went to night classes to draw birds, and when I asked whether they had clothes on and you said they didn't - you know I didn't expect this!'

"She doesn’t fetch or roll over or anything really, but she’s a terrific whistler."

"We started with fetch and heel, but we've moved on to impasto and chiaroscuro."

'Hell's freezing over. The only thing I can figure is McWit Construction actually finished a job on time.'

The ocean is no place for a star.

I'm leaving the band in order to pursue a solo career.

"When we left off last night, we were on page 15 of the National Intelligence Estimate. "

Monk Parrot.

Can You Dance?

"I didn’t know you could play."

Shark Bomb

"Can you hear me now?"

As is often the case, many of the world's great discoveries are accidental.

'He's not too fast on his feet, but he's got a hell of a right hook!'

'This is Bob. He's really short, but he's got quick hands, watch.'

Reality Show Host

'Cheer up Mom...They say dead is the new 80.'

'All good things come to an end . . .'

I didn't realise you sold shoes!

"Weird - it must have gotten mixed in with the office supplies when I left the job."

A surprisingly challenging resolution. This year my resolution is to leave well enough alone.

'This guy REALLY leads a sheltered life- he lists Santa as a reference.'

"The video of you giving that big bloke a piece of your mind has gone viral!"

'Hey, look!'

Monk with accordion hidden in his robes.

"The control group has taken control."

“If I had known I could hold my breath so long I could have made money as a side show attraction instead of borrowing from the mob.”