Unexpected Plot Twist Lover Pillows

'Isn't this 332 Graham st.?

Old Lady Joins Muggers.

"Unbelievable! A tick!"

"You weren't expecting a walrus, right?"

It was my story. A murder mystery. A who-done-it-and-got-away-with-it-until-he-wrote-about-it.

"Sorry kids, wrong house. This one is made of vegetables."

Psychologist is SHOCKED by what his elderly patent is telling him.

Death Photobombs a Holiday

The princess and the key

"The back flip was a nice touch."

'This has a great ending...he shoots her.'

Joe, this is not my idea of 'paint night at the bar.'

"You're right...it's football strategy! I think I presented our financial proposal to the youth team I coach! I must get more sleep!"

"Schedule the 'voyeur' and the 'exhibitionist' for the same time. I want them to meet."

"Now THAT'S what I call a surprise ending!!"

'My daughter eloped with a mime...'

Muggers nick nurses bag only to be showered in syringes

"Mr. Dankin, the plumber will see you now."

"Typing and shorthand will be useful but how are you at handling the unexpected?"

Crime

"… and they lived happily ever after… until the princess caught the prince with the chambermaid!"

Bull with gun

'I wouldn't do that if I were you, mister. This saloon is made entirely of ninjas.'

'Wait a minute,' thought Bob. 'This isn't my book. And those aren't my hands.'

'You called a plumber!'

"I'm just doing this until I can break into accounting."

"And I was all like - severed head in a sack? What severed head in a sack?"

Penguin emerges from freezer. Man says: 'This freezer needs defrosting.'

". . . and now, someone who needs no introduction. . ."

"It starts out with a standard romantic plot: Boy meets Girl, Boy loses Girl, wins her back, Girl kills Boy, devours his head and lays eggs in his carcass. Ok, now here's the twist..."

Fortunately, Nigel had something up his sleeve.

"Ha! I found you . . . and with my wife!"

Crab stealing fisherman's bait.

"Turns out the sound of the squeaky toy was coming from inside the house."

"When he thinks back about this years from now, he'll only remember the good probes."