Unexpected Plot Lovers Pillows

"And to think we started as a book club."

"Max! Oh, my God! There's like a billion moving ideas in there!"

"It's about sex and revenge, except for a short chapter on the Continental Congress."

Evil elves trying to take advantage of Christmas tree fairies.

Cupid and stork ambush young couple.

Phone. Oh, no! My Clark Kent clothes are gone! Secret Identity Theft.

Psychologist is SHOCKED by what his elderly patent is telling him.

'Stop him, he's got the receipe.' Duck running away

"I don't mind car chases as long as they're car chases about something."

“I’ve got an idea for a story: Gus and Ethel live on Long Island, on the North Shore. He works sixteen hours a day writing fiction. Ethel never goes out, never does anything except fix Gus sandwiches and in the end she becomes a nympho-lesbo-killer-whore. Here’s your sandwich”

Scarecrow jumps out of a birthday cake and then catches on fire.

10 commandments

Goodyear Blimp flying round globe.

"We love your manuscript! It's exactly the sort of big, sprawling epic we've been looking for!"

"We need a plot twist."

He Didn't Know How To Appreciate Nature

"It's a novel about loss, and redemption, and fantastic sex."

Ghost Porn

"No, I don't mind if you peek,' said the mystery writer to the next victim.

Mid-list Author Magazine

Galoots in cahoots

"Did you like that mystery book?"

'Well, he gave me treats, patted me, played with me: How was I supposed to know he was a burglar?'

'How was I to know the doctor's license was only a baseball card?'

'I like the lust,greed and sex - it's just the integrity that bothers me.'

'We find the defendant guilty, but feel his alibi would make a good premise for a John Grisham book.'

Pandora’s Boxing Glove

'Money's no object, lad! Whatever you want, you can have, and everything's available in our fully stocked toy department on the third floor...'

How many Christmas gifts did you get this year? I got over a dozen. Seriously? No single, childless adult with very little family and only one friend can possibly get that many Christmas gifts. Unless ... by "got," you meant ... I had Amazon wrap them all. I like to be surprised.

"Hey - this isn't snow, it's little piece of shiny plastic!"

"What's your novel about?"

'OK, you don't look at the one I'm getting and I won't look at the one you're getting me.'

Weather soaps

Mayhem, Inc. Part 13

'The scruffy gits Fawkes.'