Understated Humor Fan Pillows

Tap's fine.

"Better bring me another cookie. The last one fell in the water."

Faster, Georges, faster!

'The ghost walks this passage every night Monday to Friday. He has weekends off.'

"And this song goes out there to any girl who might consider sleeping with me."

"Wow, these slippers are really warm!"

The Brothers Grime

10 K Tail-Chase

'They help with my nicotine patch addiction.'

"Consider yourself lucky that you only got a little shaken up in that dryer--socks get lost in that thing and aren't ever seen again.'

Murder in Apartment 6-K

Pastry Hat

"You see, it's perfectly safe to tease him..."

Race track - with the race being to apply the white lines between lanes

'-and you're living proof that ALL men are not born equal, runt!'

"Grapes, Rye, Malt... I got into this through my vegetarianism."

In utero...boy, THOSE were the days!

'We found you in a cabbage!'

The Snooze Bar.

"Uh Oh! Jehovah's"

Beer Parasol.

Winter Weather.

Tequila Mockingbird

"For the last time, we never need the route with the fewest turns."

"I'm you from the future! Or the past. I've completely lost track of time."

"My favorite part of the story was when Prince Charming kissed Sleeping Beauty and she totally rebooted."

'You're supposed to bring the newspaper to ME!'

'You're one of my kids? Really? I'm so sorry, I have so many it's hard to remember them all...'

'Too many people in our state are overweight, Senator. They want fat-free pork.'

'NO, it DOESN'T come on DISC!'

'Joe has been partying hard!'

No, I don

tRUMp, Pirate President

"Well, you were late and her boyfriend didn't turn up for their wedding, so....."

Boomerang cow.