Underground Supporter Gifts

"I only like their bad albums – the good ones are too commercial."

'Have you been 'helping the environment by supporting local produce' again?'

Theatre Crowd

'Rehab centre' "I'm addicted to Irvine Welsh"

"Oh no! Some self-obsessed, anti-social bastard has graffitied over your graffiti!"

Dear Folks, it's lonely at the top.

Sports Fan - Whoever's Winning

Pub. This is John. He also loves obscure bands until they're popular then hates them. The Druidiots. Luckies. 50 ale.

"Then we just cut the cartoons with a little more baby laxative."

"What, no day spa? And you call this a luxury bunker."

"We only shop brick and mortar because my husband likes to be disgruntled face-to-face when returning things."

Blues musicians who never found their audience

One cappuccino please, and I wanted to give you this. A note. How formal. Dear small local independent coffee house ... I went to Starbucks this morning. I'm sorry. Can you ever forgive me? What if I agree to purge what I ate? The written apology is sufficient.

"The next downtown local train has entered a rift in the space-time continuum, and will arrive in 3027."

"That's very deep house."

Small store loses out to glossy big store

"Yeah, Harvey loves movies with subtitles. He wakes up so refreshed."

"$119? I can get this on the internet for $36!"

'It's a box set of box sets.'

"It's the only way I can get him to look at me when the World Cup is on."

Sleepy man dribbling on a woman on the London underground

Shop Local

'I appreciate your concern for the natino's infrastructure, and I assure you we're doing everything we can.'

Flower Seller.

Hey, I've just found some more stuff we can sell.

Pipeline Backers Hang On

No. 6 Train Graffiti Gets Personal

In a world where imitation is the sincerest form of flattery, there's nobody like Joe.

"I started out on the ground floor of this company many years ago, but my path took me in a different direction from everyone else!"

"Well...it finally happened...instead of a sound system for his wheels, Ralphie just got wheels for his sound system!"

"I miss complaining about the subway."

“I’ve got all the first-name key chains they don’t put on the rack.”

'Psst! You wanna buy some pockets?'

Watching the Street Band

"Yeah, you were right, it was a great way to see the game, but the referee has spotted us: We'd better go..."