Underemployed Worker Gifts

"We never have any money! Just my luck to marry a window washer."

"I figure if I was still employed, I wouldn’t get to spend all this time with you!"

'I'm Jeremy's father. I'm a computer consultant and I'm unemployed.'

"He's having a hard time finding work."

"Sitting here with you each day at sunset reminds me I have to get a job."

'You must be the only 'Jack-of-all-trades' who is out of work in all of them!'

"We're all in the same boat, except it's more like a life raft than an actual boat."

"I just need help getting started. A little seed money."

"Todd was glad he had a support animal."

'Can't stand diary products myself, but a job's a job.'

"Victims of out-sorcery."

'The good news is that from now on I belong to a very rare species. There aren't many personnel managers who create their own pink slip.'

"Things are getting really bad around here. Phil, the office plant, was just let go."

"We're not on vacation anymore. The company folded."

'So far more education hasn't helped me get a job. I think I'll get some student loans and get some more education.'

"Look - we'll whistle when it's fifteen dollars an hour."

"Well, YOU tell personnel you need every winter off and see if you get a job!"

"He used to be a senior fact checker at Meta — now he's just a pedant."

'Management is very concerned about 'work life' balance, particularly where back room staff are concerned...We think you give too much, you need to get your lives back.'

"I belong to that heroic little band of unemployed on whom a healthy economy depends."

"I didn't get a job at the job fair, but I got a blue ribbon for best resume."

America's Biggest Export...

'Sorry Sir, but 'impersonating a log' is not a very marketable skill...'

"Even after all that's happened, I feel no less regal."

Two bored males hanging out on a tatty sofa.

'Believe me, mister... I'm an old hand in capital procurement!'

'Young lady, stop talking to your dad in such a disrespectful way! After all he's a man with degrees and can fill in his unemployment benefit application in five different languages!'

Cards Galore.

'I'm going to have to let you go.'

"I know you need some certainty in your job, so you're fired."

"Right now, I'm between naps."

The company relocated - didn't they tell you?

'We offer competitive pay, good benefits and an attractive severance package.'

'I'm a redundant bank teller.'

'Don't you hate people who blatantly use office parties to network?'