Typing Whiz Prints

'You must have a lot of untapped potential.'

This is Lenny the leopard with the on-the-spot news.

"I've just been offered a job sorting out the Y1K bug.."

Frank & Ernie's Diner. Special: Scrabbled Eggs. No, sir, it's not a misprint -- Ernie adds alphabet soup.

Multi-tasking.

Dog Park

Need Supercomputer to finish my PhD, Please Help.

"You keep impeccable time."

Hamlet's struggle with online shopping addiction. To eBay or not to eBay.

Ninedency: A budding tendency

Sauce for the Goose

Nerd tryouts.

'This computer has a fast modem, the latest Pentium, increased RAM, a huge hard drive and broadband connections. Only one problem...slow pointer fingers.'

'WE use these computers to gather and organise data for our school district and, on a slow day, to play solitaire.'

"I think before we begin to address me, we need to talk about the clown in the room."

"She's a show dog...purebred, of course." "That's great! My guy's a Sanskrit scholar...wrote for the Harvard Lampoon."

"Don’t you eyeball me, Ed! That’s right, look down at the table. Only technicians who remember to back up the data can look at me! And if you start to cry I will fire you!"

'Yep,that's it Mr.White. And NOW go, Control-Alt-Delete, then re-enter.'

'My dog ate my computer.'

'Unaccustomed as I am to public speaking...'

STRIP Hambone: Workers help is a hindrance

GO AHEAD ... MAKE MY DAY!

"I hate you! You don't understand me and you don't understand my software!"

"It's a swearbox."

"I spy with my little eye…"

"When they said progress made our replacement inevitable I thought they meant by AI."

'...And, from what I understand, they don't have any hard drive at all.'

"Brilliant cover letter, lousy résumé."

"The results are impressive, but it'll be decades before we can transmit and receive pornography."

'Those enormous worldwide internet communities.'

"After a long day at the office writing business software...Bob loves to relax writing game software."

'I'm afraid you've failed the Turing test.'

Math Teacher

I'm not sure which, but he's just invented either writing or vandalism. (Published originally on Feb. 11, 2011.)

"I love the fact that you're a computer genius, Erwin. I just don't like fact that you look like one."