Twitcher Pillows

Blackbirds.

Pounding speeds up the computer.

"Young Frankenstein"

Robot Parts $5

Robots search for people's personal information in the cloud.

'My penmanship has really improved since I got a laser printer.'

boy plugging leak in a barrel with his finger

"I'm grounded. I forgot to delete the car's computer history after we did those crop circles on Earth."

The Computer Bore

'First you forget logarithms. Then you forget how to do long division. Then the multiplication table begins to go...'

"This software will cut my workload in half, so I purchased two."

Rejected Titles For The Canadian National Anthem.

Needed Inventions: An Airbag To Protect The Viewer Against A Really Lousy Program.

"Once I connect with my server over there, I can turn my lamp on and off."

Early cyborg.

"I thought you were making a coffee table?"

'I solved the problem of dead zones on my cell phone with a personal satellite,'

'…and remember - around HERE, ‘talk is CHEEP'.'

"Siri, who’s the fairest of them all?"

Gadget geek.

The Not-So Smart Meter

"He's on screen saver. Just tap him."

'Hon? Did your phone go dead? Hello?'

"It's a smart hamper that sucks up clothes. My mom claims I leave my clothes on the floor, so she has it follow me wherever I go."

'I think I see what's making your funny noise.'

Bicycle sat nav.

'I'm no expert, but I think we're a little behind when it comes to the latest industry technology.'

"No, it's not a bug. Since you keep losing you phone, I purchased you a phone-locating drone."

Congratulations on your retirement!

"The man who invented autocorrect died from the corona vibrator."

'Ugh! Another oil puddle in the living room – bad robot dog!'

'I really can't stay for dessert. Why don't you stay and DVR the rest of the date for me?'

'3-D TV Kit'

Fixing the Computer.

"After I fix your laptop, can I have a bedtime story?"