Twisted Tale Aficionado Pillows

"Go ahead and eat her, she's a pain in the a**."

'It was owned by a little ol' lady who didn't drive it. She used a motor scooter on Saturdays.'

Fishing Tales

The Tale of the Tape of the Tail.

Fishing Boat Derby

"That's right kiddo, I'm one of the original band members of the Musicians of Bremen..."

Paul Bunyan gets the leg-lengthening Operation

Men reading Tall Stories, and Short Stories in a Library

'All this is nuthin! There was one yeaw up noth...when it snowed fah two yeaws! I had t'dig down ten feet t'haul in my lobstah traps.'

"Yes, I was using my mobile whilst driving... I was calling the police to tell them I was chasing a gang of bank robbers!"

"At long last, Wyatt, our dream has come true and we are within reach of the legendary toast fields of the Sierra Madre."

"Pecos Bildungsroman"

A Salmon Lie

'Take Gerald a cup of punch or something, I think he's feeling left out.'

Captain Eddie's New Boat:'The insurance company laughed last year when I insisted on adding Kraken coverage.'

'Sure you always catch bigger fish than me. Your arms are a foot longer than mine.'

Circus trousers

'He doesn't exaggerate, he just remembers big.'

'That's right kids: I jumped through rings of fire when I was with the Circus!'

"The true story"

"So I break free and I swear that hook was this big."

Paul Bunyon, Castaway

'I don't believe for one minute that an octopus crawled up last night and ate all the coconuts!'

'Women don't simply believe everything we hear, you know.' - 'But that does not stop you repeating it.'

'Yes, the owners are giraffes...Did I forget to mention it?...'

'He's lying about either a fish or his penis.'

A Tale of the Sea

"This is your great-great-uncle Enchilmo Ladas. We called him 'Enchi' for short."

"In your original statement, you said the fish was much bigger."

"His nose grew every time he lied? That must've taken all the fun out of fishing."

"I must have hit 20 home runs!"

Fisherman catches the Big Fish

'Brian hated his long legs and dinner parties'

"You've been exaggerating again, haven't you?"