Tweet Trendsetter Gifts

'If it's any consolation, us getting sent to the Principal's office is now trending on Twitter.'

"M'lady, we’ve reached peak Brooklyn."

'That's it then - I'll take the slinky high-heeled cocktail number in a 5 and the everyday workshoe in a 7...'

Men's Suits. I hear being suave and sophisticated is coming back in style. That's just an urbane legend.

CLOTHES-HORSES OF THE ART SCENE

"Even the waiters here are organic."

Handbag store - "Perfect."

Bad hair day!

La Table

'She's so put together!'

Pashminas are sooo noughties!

'Good news - basic black is being shown this season.'

Special offer on snakeskin ties.

'I want you to paddle against the current.'

Men's business romper.

'We manufacture micro computing circuits. We're looking to hire someone who can anticipate the next small thing.'

"The Chicken: Just another body type that shouldn't be permitted to wear yoga pants."

'Awright...Who's the dirty, lowdown varmint who's copyin' my plaid-shirt-and-stone-wash-jeans-with-matching-boots-and-vest ensemble?'

This cream won't get rid of cellulite...it just makes it easier to slide into your jeans.

'…and remember - around HERE, ‘talk is CHEEP'.'

"I feel like we've walked into some sort of epidemic of hipatitus."

"And now. . . which shoes?"

"Absolutely not!"

Rap music

Keeping warm.

Bird Tweet.

'At least we look cool. Especially with the wind chill factor.'

'These fit just right. Do you have anything too tight?'

You're telling me not to choose sides between Google and Apple. Precisely. Computer Villa. Stay neutral. Continue to support both companies. Emotionally. Right. By buying as much as you can from both companies. Doesn't that only benefit you? Heretic. Absolve yourself by upgrading your phone! Computer Villa.

"By the end of next week, these fads such as social media, automobiles and making fire will all be over."

Jewellery Shop: Disposable income spoken here.

"She'll have a semi-wizened, double ristretto with a dot of quail's milk - and please recite a poem while you make it."

A Macaroni in 1772

Man admiring his patterned clothes in the mirror

'They've certainly got designs on your purse!'