Tv Surfing Fan Gifts

'Let's take a short break from business and visit the gourmet cooking channel.'

Surfing koala.

'It's a program on paranoia. Every time I leave the room, they stop and wait for me to come back.'

'Bummer Dude! No waves. Moondoggie punked me!'

'And for those of you calling in to say he is behind us - OH NO he isn't.'

'With the kind cooperation of the underworld, we present live, for the first time on TV, an actual holdup.'

Woah, This was well worth swapping my flying saucer for!

TV Situations vacant.

Moses' TV guide.

"Well, now we know what Letterman's doing, what are we doing?"

"If you can't see the sea I can recommend an optician in the High Street."

I lost as a contestant on the quiz show, but they gave me this lovely parting gift...

'They had to increase security. He's being stalked by a deranged paleontologist.'

Pastor of Muppets

"Let's welcome Elaine back from her two weeks in Hawaii and hope this passes soon..."

'Well, it WAS worth nine thousand dollars. Sorry about that.'

"Popular astrologer and psychic Malder Tercado's contract with a national Spanish-language TV network was not renewed. Tercado was reportedly surprised by the news...saying he didn't see it coming."

'Too much TV, maybe. Is there a John Wane marathon going on?'

"This year has been a disaster. But, my breaking point was when Apple TV+ hijacked 'It's The Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown,' away from network television."

'I hate rainy days!'

'If you smiled in the mornings, you'd come up in the ratings, too.'

99 Dalmations - Edited for television.

Shark Surfing the Waves.

"Rats, we can't bow ride this one: it's a hovercraft..."

"We've had to rename it, no one watches talk shows anymore."

"Dude, are you taking selfies?"

Televised Insomnia Benefit Telethon puts couple to sleep.

They watch for a while, then, unlike humans, they get bored.

"This Fall on NBC: Fish Out of Water"

'Please turn it down - Daddy's trying to do your homework.'

'Working from home is great! You can keep your mind occupied watching daytime TV.'