Tv Quiz Aficionado T-Shirts

"Now our contestant will try to guess which of you is the very last individual of your species."

'I don't know much about history, don't know much biology ... but we'll be OK if there's a round on song lyrics.'

"Our next contestant is Mildred and her specialist subject is "Other People's Business""

A planet like ours - pub quiz dolphin

'This has been a Chris Wallace special report -- we now switch you back to Mike Wallace....'

"Next riddle without looking it up, can you tell me which is the routing number and which is the account?"

"Perhaps we'd be more likely to reach an agreement if the British delegate would stop shouting 'Deal or no deal' all the time."

"And now your General Knowledge Round...Where does clean laundry come from?"

"Can you tell the class how you spell Albuquerque?"

"Apparently he told Chris Tarrant it was just enough to pay off his mortgage!"

Universe Challenge

'And your specialist subject is the Invisible Man films?'

'Hi Peter, it's Chris Tarrant here, from 'Who Wants to be a Millionaire?''

Pub Quiz

'On tonight's news: Katie Couric interviews Katie Couric.'

"Has it been in your family long?"

Name That Salary

"Damn it! Ask something on the Franco-Prussian War!"

'Can we have a starter for ten, please?'

Mind versus matter.

'Interesting specialist subjects.'

When TV networks hold pledge drives, you know the economy isn't in great shape.

Quiz Night: Questions on all subjects....

'We're requesting a delay so my client can appear on lots of talk shows.'

"What's Your Problem, Man?"