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"Well, at least it's an improvement from last night."

'It is too snowing!'

'I've seen nothing I've liked since Victor Meldrew!'

Mr. Rogers' lockdown

Munster Island.

Pamela Anderson Ward.

"We ought to send PBS some money so it can afford better pledge-break specials."

Chameleon's TV Camouflage

'Oh, you'll like school -- It's like Sesame Street, only in 3-D!'

'You can see pictures - without an aerial?'

'We now pause for technical difficulties....'

Head of Dumbing-Down

'Oh no, it's Carol Vorderman singers'.

Martha Stewart's punishment - "Well, if you ask me, it might have been worse. The court could have sentenced me to watch all my old television programs."

Okay

Antiques. Special on Low-Def.

"One, one Milky Way! Two, two Milky Ways! Three, three Milky Ways! Four Milky Ways! Ah ah ah!!!!!"

"He SAYS that's his classroom, but looks to me like he's found some old reruns of Hollywood Squares!"

'I can fix the fuzziness and the vertical hold, but I can't do anything about Chris Matthews.'

'Disgusting! It's a blow-by-blow description of an episode of Terry and June.'

'It took us a long time, but we finally made it -- take us to Mork and Mindy.'

Happiness is a warm TV.

It's a good idea but, it'll never catch on.

'Remember, kids. Pester your parents for Chunkos.'

'The picture's snowy.'

Red Indians patiently waiting for what they think is television to be switched on, on an American locomotive.

Kellogg's Wapners

'Even the TV dinners are a repeat.'

BBC Creative Dept.