Tv Control Enthusiast Gifts

"Touch that control and I'll punch your lights out..."

This is Lenny the leopard with the on-the-spot news.

"Don't worry - I'm here for the television."

Royal Mail boss to become ITV boss.

Where the Appalachian Trail Crosses the Path of Least Resistance

"Well, the remote's not dowmn the back of the couch."

"The batteries in his TV remote died. The shock of not being able to use it for two minutes has put him in a temporary state of shock."

"The TV remote? So, I decide what we watch tonight?"

'Someday TVs will be in big boxes on the floor.'

We saw this episode of Grey's Anatony, I recognize the symptoms.

"Do you know any other songs besides the theme to The Andy Griffin Show?"

"I find that hugely offensive!"

'Contrary to the popular view, our studies show that it is real life that contributes to violence on television.'

Big screen TV.

Toy plane with pilot eject.

'Come quick: Rin Tin Tin is on TV again...'

'Poll results are in...90% of Americans can't spell Schwarzenneger.'

"By labeling it, I control it."

What are you in the mood to get confused watching tonight?

'well, Fred, I see you're finally embracing technology.'

'It's O.K. Charlie - you can relax. The T.V. repairman said, 'it can be fixed!''

"You really need to think about getting glasses."

"Would you like to sleep through the film or the variety show?"

'I thought that 'remote gizmo' was just for manoeuvring the caravan down the drive!'

"It's not just the same old crap—it's wider."

"You need to lose 20 cable channels."

'We've moved some fussy people, but she tops it!'

'If school is so important, why isn't it on television?'

". . . yes, sir, folks . . . and furthermore, folks . . . for real quality, folks . . . yes, sir, folks . . ."

"...and in conclusion..."

It's only a remote, dear...if you want better programs you will need a wand.

"I've had enough of watching grass grow. What's on the Paint Drying Channel?"

"We laughed. We cried. But mostly we watched TV."

Must-See Lockdown TV.

'Now ask yourself Gerald, do we really need ALL these channels?'