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'No doubt about it - he'd make a lovely Home Guard dog!'

"We'll be found soon I didn't pay the television licence"

"Of course he's smiling. He's getting $15,000 to give a lecture on free speech."

"And just like that, e got rid of Florida."

"This is a lovely old song that tells of a young woman who leaves her cottage, and goes off to work. She arrives at her destination, and places some solid NHHS in a flask containing 0.50 atm ofammonia, and attempts to determine the pressures of ammonia and hydrogen sulide when equilibrium is reached."

"Bond James, Bond."

"Cheers! Well, this is exciting. I've never had a dinner date with a duck before." "Relax, honey. I'm just here for the bread."

"In high school, I was quite the star in metal shop."

"I'm grounded. I forgot to delete the car's computer history after we did those crop circles on Earth."

Showbiz Awards

6 Quarantine-Friendly Fashions

'So let me see if I've got it straight. It was a very large squirrel and your husband is a nut.'

Director/Action Man toy.

Dietician to man: 'To address your spare tire we must first get in touch with your inner tube.'

'My body has rejected every diet I've tried.'

Life is for the birds.

"Maybe the next one will be a singles cruise."

'As you can see by the pie chart, most of our expenses go to well, pie.'

'Is there another doctor in the house? He wants a second opinion.'

The first car accident.

"No, I like the plan. Just saying, have you ever done any actual tunnelling?"

"You may now kiss the bride..."

'Wow, the field really is a frozen tundra!'

Fat Kid 10- Eats an ice-cream

'I love your playing....especially when you stop!'

He's in training for the rugby World Cup.

"Fill out an application? Can't I just text it?"

"Renk just discovered beard oil."

I must say a winter wedding certainly saves on confetti!'

"They're wearing cameras. How humiliating."

'I think you're getting the hang of it.'

Painting by the numbers for adults