Turning Thirty Pillows

'Turning forty is nothing in this day and age. Forty is the new thirty.' 'Damn! I remember how bad I felt the LAST time I was thirty.'

"I didn't start seriously accessorizing until my mid-thirties."

"Stop moping. Lots of people who don't make a million by thirty make tons later on."

"I'd like the garden salad with the blue cheese dressing, and my mother would like me married by age thirty."

"Your contents have shifted."

Gary turns 40.

"Sorry, kid. No off-campus drinking until you're twenty-one."

'It's perfectly normal for middle-aged men to put on a little weight.'

Inside One's Memory Bank

"Oh, please. Lord, no ... I'm only 50! No, please – anything but reading glasses!"

Treat Dispensers for the Middle-Aged

"Faster! Middle age is gaining on you!"

"You're in perfect health and look half your age – I'm prescribing something to help you shut up about it."

"Quick, I need a drink. Someone just called me Ma'am."

The Gingerbread Man Hits 50.

Ed's receding hairline!

"Enjoy yourself while you can because before you know it, you've surpassed your 'Best Used By' date."

Middle Age: When you finally get your head together, and your body starts to fall apart!

Do you think I'm sixty?

The Woodstock Medical-Emergency Tent - 1994

"Can you hurry up with the cake? I have to travel the world, have a career and start a family"

"As the years go by, and my hair recedes, I comb my parting with such sweet sorrow."

"I'm 59 and they say I'm middle aged. Just how many people do you know who are 118?"

'Many Happy Redundan... HA! RETURNS of the day, Mackay.'

The summer of her 39th year, Eleanor could be found most evenings on a hill (known locally as Robert's Hump) doing aerobics of her own devising.

'Push'n 50, but ya still got it!!'

'I thought forty is the new thirty.'

Midlife: You Are Here.

Middle Age: When rolling out of bed is easy, but getting up off the floor isn't!

"Just when I’ve reconciled the fact that I’m in my 40s, my 50th birthday shows up."

'Man, I'm age 21 now and so far, I haven't done anything important. Things can't go on like this or I will have to forget my plan to become rich and famous by writing my autobiography at age 35!'

'Tell the doctor to hurry. It's an emergency. I just turned middle aged!'

"You've come to a fork in the road – age-defying or age-appropriate?"

"The next one is a hard-rockin', kick-ass, take-no-prisoners tune we wrote about turning sixty."

"You're 30 now. Where do you see yourself in five years?" "Thirty five."