Turnaround Guru T-Shirts

Robot Parts $5

'You could be a constant inspiration for us to come up with a plan to get a leg up on our competition...you're hired!'

Large Dollar Sign Office Block

"So, we look to the fourth quarter as a time of healing."

Things-to-do-today: Daily workboxes piled up on desk.

"It's a memo from the legal department reminding us to (heh-heh), 'keep our noses clean'."

"Gentlemen, I'm pleased to say the firm is perfectly positioned to avoid chapter eleven and still be in existence this time next year."

'I'm judging by your silence Al that you're giving me the green light on the Greenwich project. I just want to say that I admire your leadership. I guess that's why you've been running this company for 20 years.'

The MBA Draft

Sir Winston Churchill

'His best qualities are circumventing questions and evading answers.'

'You realize, we can't use the 'benign neglect' method for everything.'

"Any questions?"

'The downside to my meteoric rise to the top is that I didn't have the opportunity to step on many people.'

"I suppose just climbing the greasy pole is no longer an option..."

"For heaven's sake, Ogden, it's vacation time! Must you make your little lists even on vacation time?"

'I'm sorry but I'm afraid the corporation is going in a different direction.'

The Dubloon Stops Here

'I'm afraid you don't have the leadership qualities we're seeking.'

'The good news is, we did as well as expected last quarter. The bad news is, we didn't expect to do too well.'

'You'll be happy to see that I've finally managed to turn things around.'

Teamwork!

Career opportunities

'Instead of a raise, Yomp, you may call me 'Chief', instead of Mr Staghorn.'

"Uh-Oh..."

'It's only fair to warn you that if you get the job there would be a lot of filing involved.'

'I had to overcome stereotypical misunderstandings about who makes a good leader.'

The bad news is our boxer shorts are still bursting into flames. The good news is our brand recognition is through the roof

Office worker pushing a pile of papers on trolley.

"It's hard not to take a mutiny personally."

"Ahh... don't you just LOVE that new, re-organized-under-bankruptcy-protection smell?"

'Hey! What's the big idea!?!'

'He's been brought in to save the company.'

A balloon seller is selling thought bubble balloons

"If I seem excited, Mr. Bolling, it's only because I know that I can make you a very rich man."