Turbulence Taster T-Shirts

'How are you enjoying the ups and downs of equatorial swimming?'

"States of tofu"

Tension filled the tent.

"Our fresh seasonal hand-crafted brews contain a full serving of spring vegetables."

Fly Tastings: 'Notice that hint of dog fur and then let that full bodied garbage finish unfold.'

"We have three house blends: 'One More Chance', 'Forget About It' or 'I'll See You In Fun Court'."

'And that's how to make pancakes.'

'Your blood pressure is extremely high - your resistance to things that cause it, extremely low!'

"Is this a dagger I see before me?"

A new career for George W. Bush: taster in a pretzel factory.

Ethnic food springing out of a menu.

The Schematic map of Miss Mathilda's afternoon assortment box of Bonbons

"One man's dirty water is another man's Earl Grey."

'Relax, folks, he just did that for me. When I get the hiccups, a little scare never fails to cure them.'

"I try not to be picky, but this meal is a bit too sticky!"

"Column A are things they said would kill you ten years ago but are now considered totally good for you. Column B are things they currently think will kill you."

"My computer still won't work. It must still hold a grudge from when I punched it in frustration."

'Ooops. I hit a hair pocket.'

Comparative Review of the New York Post and its App

Two boys rehearsing,

"I'm always tempted by the more esoteric flavors- if only out of pity."

"Bottled or tap?"

'With this extreme turbulence, the meals really are in flight.'

'Sorry, sir, but every cloud has a turbulent lining.'

Twisted Peel annoys his doctor with a question about paracetamol.

Evil Personified $1.00

Devils and Angels

"I knew I didn't need the Death by Chocolate."

'. . . of course, batteries are not included.'

'It's okay - they're VITAMIN-ENRICHED chocolates!'

"Come to the dark side."

"Don't worry! It's just some light turbulence!"

'I don't dare look at that dessert...but feel free to describe it to me in graphic detail!'

"It was thrilling, yet terrifying. I felt like a diabetic kid in a candy store."

'Sorry sir, no vomitting allowed before take-off.'