Tulip Tiptoer T-Shirts

'An environmentalist group today petitioned Congress to ban 'Tiptoe Through the Tulips.''

'We use to tiptoe through the tulips. . . now we just waddle through the weeds.'

'I swear, if he didn't always pick up the tab, I'd never go drinking with him.'

"I'm trying to write a drinking song, but I can't get past the first couple of bars."

Tiptoe through the tulips with me!

'We want to go where the Geraea canescens grow wild and we can tiptoe through the phacelia crenulata!'

"Do we need change? That's a $100 bill for a $53 check, Mr. Presumptuous."

'We have developed an APP we use to import ingredients from the Internet, merge them in the computer, and then download them into the distiller and then just bottle the output.'

'I think you'll find you can't tiptoe wearing clogs!'

'A packet o' crisps, and have one for yersel'.'

'You're a nihilist, eh? — well, at least you have something to believe in.'

Little Dutch boy tends tulip plant

"I got out of tulips after the market collapsed, but I'm slowly getting back in. Especially pink ones."

'Thanks, Sis, but I think it's my turn to leave the stealth tip.'

One shandy and two glasses of tap water please.

"This wasn't me, it was the bottle talking."

'This $10,000 bottle of Bordeaux is also a powerful solvent. It entirely dissolved my savings account.'

"We're sending you to a specialist in Holland. The Dutch, as you know, are experts on tulips."

'Waiter, your tip's getting cold.'

Tip responsibly

'Invented a new cocktail.' '

'Would you like to start with a drink, a menu, or my gratuity.'

'I never get tipped!'

'So, does your wrist-wearable wine analyzer have anything so say about that Burgundy, like how to get it out of silk?'

5-6 pm: Unhappy hour - mourn the loss of jobs to apps, bots, drones.

'Are you tiptoeing through the tulips again, Iggy?'

'Just give him the tip, Harold.'

Shoveling Snow in Spring

"You can have my doggie bag as a tip."

I remember your lousy tip. Enjoy MY trickle-down theory.'

"I prefer the cheap stuff."

'It's that waitress I always leave big tips to.'

Geert Wilders as a broken tulip,

'Switch me to the cheap stuff when I start talking with my W. C. Fields voice.'

Harry, I've just had a tip!