Tsa Officer Gifts

'Could you maybe fax a copy of this to my radiologist?'

Going through the wringer at airport security

"For your comfort, you will be searched by someone of your own level of sexiness."

3.3 Ounces

That's a shame. What's a shame? Did I do something wrong, officer? TSA. Yes, you did. You let your boyfriend turn you down. So what if he's 15,000 miles away in Russia? If I were your man, I'd never let that stop me. I would fly to the ends of the earth for you. This routing ever work for you? Good lord this routine must work for you.

Given his lack of dental insurance, Tony was initially happy with the officer of a federally subsidized cavity search.

GATE 13, DON'T TOUCH MY JUNK!

"She's demanding to be patted down again."

"Sure, pat down strangers all day, but I ask for one little hug..."

"So, explain this photobomb concept one more time."

"Look on the bright side...you'll be here for all eternity, which is still better than the TSA security lines this travel season..."

'What I don't understand is how all three of us managed to get the figures wrong!'

"Now that's what I call customer service!"

'The fun begins when we go through airport security.'

'Where was the TSA?'

"How is the budget forecast looking?"

'I hope you ain't got no tax up here!'

Attack of the Underwear Bomber

"Careful."

Novak Djokovic has his visa denied to play in Australia as he is unvaccinated

'As the government sees it, the U.S. budget would be fine if more deficit earners like you, Mr. Wald, go on the ball!'

IRS Audit Section

"It only made sense for us to finally merge."

"You inherited an extra toe from your father and didn't pay the inheritance tax on it."

Gladstone returning to Westminster without a new ticket

"Well, if it's a fairy story you want, here's a good one that arrived at the office today."

'Will you bring in Mr.Harris' file - you'll find it under 'U' for unbelievable.'

'One carry-on!'

'So then. The handsome p.c. noticed that the tax disc on Cinderella's pumpkin carriage was well out of date.'

'I know a lot of folks get us confused, but I'm actually taxes!'

'Ah, I see you made £2,000 more for me this year.'

'Jenkins won the health savings award with his suggestion that we have our employee hernia checks done at the airport by TSA agents.'

"I can't stop conducting random security checks."

Attention: Speed Troughs

TSA