Trying New Recipes T-Shirts

"....And then chuck the whole lot in the dustbin and phone for a take-away."

'What happened to you?'

'As a surprise I thought I'd give the new cookbook a try tonight.'

"Was there a photo in the recipe book? I'd love to see what it's meant to look like."

'I ran out of sugar, so I used salt.'

Before/After

"The soup of the day is pineapple with a hint of rum."

"Charles didn't like tofu."

"Oh we're fine, my husbands just learning to cook during the quarantine."

I made you a cake!

And then in Italy. . . "But I really don't like bubblegum gelato."

'Diet considerations.'

"I'm unable to process this image."

'I told you not to order the chocolate cream surprise.'

"So, I went into this fancy new butcher shop and they were selling ostrich of all things!"

"Our cook caught today's special. What makes it so special is that we have no idea what it is. We're coping it's edible."

"What's cookin', Tia Carmen?"

'One last thing. I want you each to wear these in the off chance that your reserve chute fails.'

"This is my first book, but if I like it I may buy another in the near future."

The Nervous Gourmet:Low-Risk Chicken

...If sauce has not begun to thicken after 10 minutes, pour contents back into can and wait for your wife to get home.

'Just add eggs. That sounds easy.'

"We didn't have any whipped cream, so I used foaming hand soap."

"Just remember...the main ingredient in all my dishes is love."

'...now pour the mixture into a baking dish...'

'Are you sure the recipe calls for a whole cup of good burgundy?'

Hot Rinzelophtats

Cooking with Wine: "Oops! Almost split some in the food."

But I followed the recipe exactly.

Escargots to Go. 'I told you this would never work in the fast food market!'

"That is why you don't put 'instant rice' in a slow cooker."

"Well? How was your first bungee jump?"

"Bingo, it's the hippy lady again! She always throws something interesting: last week it was honey-beer bread..."

"I'll get the onion soup... it's the only thing on the menu that I don't know why it's bad for me!"

"Mas agua for the gringos?"