Trouble-shooting Explorer T-Shirts

Cyclist looks bemused as his efforts to pump up a flat tyre inflates the the bike frame instead.

"You're fired."

'So much for your new Satnav!'

"It's Dr. Sadie. Go ahead, caller." "Yeah, how come you haven't said 'Merry Christmas' yet?" "Oh, that’s because I was hoping to provoke everyone who’s upset about the so-called 'war on Christmas' to spend all their time on hold waiting to castigate me. That way, all the normal people who don’t think Christmas is just another chance to play the victim can open their gifts in peace." "You're welcome, America." "Why haven't you played 'Jingle Bells' yet?"

The experience angler is prepared for little snags of courses and knows the most scientific way to deal with them.

'Little is known about these amazing creatures, as there have only been a few live sightings, by giant squid scientists. Despite previous beliefs, they are actually a land animal, as the fins and respiratory system are removable.'

I don't know if neuronal stem cells can or cannot become blood cells but one thing is for sure, neuronal stem cells can become controversial.

"And for a left-handed designated hitter and a player to be named later, Mr. Steinbrenner would gladly fly Elián home."

Assault weapons go over the cliff.

Let's make a bonfire of our troubles.

"And everything from my dig is brought here where it's identified, classified, interpreted, and the eaten."

"I see you've come prepared for an in-depth interview."

A tourist sees that every sign leads the right way.

"It's amazing! There's even a place to put your beer!"

'Have you been under much pressure lately, Mr. Verne?'

'I don't know why you find it so hard to stop and ask for directions.'

'Bob, you're spending too much time deer hunting. It's starting to show on you.'

'My wife insisted I stop and ask someone for directions. Could you just pretend you're giving them to me?'

'We've travelled tandem all our mrried life!'

'I'm doomed anyway, so I may as well make the most of it...'

Line, area and volume

'I know where the hive is. I just can't tell left from right.'

"Yes, we've been lost before, but never this lost."

iPhone Senior

Jihadi Art Critics Circle

'Didn't we fly over this hill ten minutes ago?'

"An amusing story no doubt Captain, but let me tell you about my experiences with the head hunters of the Amazon!"

"Lost, what are you talking about? I'm not lost!"

Confusing directions,

'OK, let's try it again. This time without the GPS.'

"There's a whole world out here waiting to be discovered!"

'Have you farted?'

Scuba diver using beer rather than air.

"I did my homework, but it got lost in cyberspace."

"You were ferocious when you rushed to get us those seats on the Jitney."