Trial Lawyer Pillows

"Never mind what I did, Your Honor. I want to be judged for who I am, as an individual."

"Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, say hi to my client."

What barristers/attorneys are really thinking - "Beer."

'They're generic nametags. We're all from the 'Women Trial Lawyers' Association of Washtenaw County.'

Man on crutches leaving courtroom: 'I got off on the wrong foot when I said the forklift ran over my right foot.'

First we sue the guy who saved your life. We'll file a no-class-action suit.

Trail Lawyers For The Pretentious - "J'accuse!", "Mais Non!"

Lawyer to dog about ambulance: 'I'll race ya.'

Law Offices

"How many crimes are you going to get me off and commit me back into those hell-hole streets out there!?"

'Your Honor, the jury is doing the wave again!'

"What do you mean 'you don't want to get involved'? You're my attorney!"

"I object, Your Honor! The witness is being coached."

Trial by Media

"You're fired."

Lynching on social media

"Obama didn’t get to name a Supreme Court justice during his final year. So how come Trump does?"

"Good boy."

Opportunities in Coronatimes

"Of course he's smiling. He's getting $15,000 to give a lecture on free speech."

The Signing of tthe United States Constitution

'Am I being too suspicious or do you think it's possible that they're crooked?'

'Couldn't Peter claim Mr. McGregor's garden was an 'attractive nuisance?'

'When we get there let me do the double talking.'

Now leaving designated Free Speech Zone. Shut it!

"HR-bill 9495. Cutting down non-profits."

"I see that he is growing as fast as your law firm."

Solicitor speaks legal jargon and has a translator who tells client: 'You haven't a hope!'

''...And defend the Constitution of the United States.' -- And now, I'd like to pardon the following Illinois politicians....'

Flags

'Ok, I'm in a paperwork mood. Let 'er rip.'

Campaign for Plain English

US Immigration and Naturalization Service: If you're yearning to breath free...Get Out.

Things-to-do-today: Daily workboxes piled up on desk.

'I had my attorney draw this up. It states that if I choose to rise, I don't necessarily have to shine.'