Trenchcoat Fashionista Pillows

“I’ve got all the first-name key chains they don’t put on the rack.”

Carioca

A man wearing a ruff and a feather cap

"I got a job!"

Fermeture des restaurants: la résistance s'organise

Birthday Cake

'Does my bum look big in this?'

A sign outside the "Museum of Modern Gift Items" reads "T-shirts of the Masters Sale".

"Hillary Clinton is polling well here. Sales off pants suits are up."

"Now, be honest. Do these glasses make me look ridiculous?"

"I'm looking for something that won't say anything about me."

"Now these prescription glasses are popular with our clients who like to be stylish yet lay low."

"A duck call won't grab the attention of a modern duck. You need to draw them in with Snapchat."

'Post-Hibernation Blues'

A sweet and tender kiss

An anarchist angel wearing his halo as a hoop earring,

'I accidentally flipped onto my back and couldn't get up. That's the last time I wear a turtleneck.'

'Going as a high-thread-count ghost again this year.'

'This place has been bailed out more often than Greece.'

Cowgirl applying bullet shaped lipstick.

Wrapping up trees.

"I don't know why my dad insists on dressing like a tourist when he gets on Google Earth."

'The sport's still a mystery to me. I just found out that I look great in uniform.'

"Very Republican. I love it."

'A player' carried in his sedan chair, preceded by his footman

Saul and the Pauls

'I stay out of the sun and use a fan: That way, I don't need to roll in the mud to keep cool...'

Why concealed carry is not an issue for archery.

"Let me remind you all of the policy against dressing provocatively, and yes, we're referring to what you wore last Tuesday, Don."

No, it can't be my size, it's comfortable.

'Now, that's just my luck! I show up at this restaurant for the first time wearing a red shirt and you run out of tomato sauce!'

"The Sunak suit is the next Big Thing in fashion."

Got anything in a corporate logo?