Traveling Spender T-Shirts

"And then in Italy Muriel has spent her life savings buying vintage polka dots."

"So the plan is to fly everyone for free. But we'll charge $400.00 per bag."

A treasure map shows you all the roads without tolls.

"It was a holiday I'll never forget...I saw life in the raw!"

"You just had to book the economy cruise, didn't you?"

"We're off. We got a loan to fill er up!"

Excess Baggage: Airlines are constantly working on new seating configurations.

"If your luggage is in your clothes it doesn't count!"

'He must be going economy!'

An airplane with a sardine can opener instead of a door

'Margaret, what are we doing on this cruise ship that we couldn't have done at home, cheaper?'

'Can I ask you what you've had to eat this morning, Sir? . . .Have you evacuated your bowels since then? . . . I'm afraid I'll have to charge you for the additional weight.'

'And, at those prices, we have two wheel well seats available.'

Cheapskate Cruises

Getting out of baggage fees is tricky, another sweater or two and I'd be charged for an extra seat.

"It was rated on all the travel websites. 'Best economy tour'."

'Phone for help? Are you mad? Have you any idea how much it costs to use a mobile abroad?'

'Whoever stole your credit card is spending a lot less with it than you did!'

Expensive greeting cards.

'Any other husband would hire two pairs of skis.'

"Now THAT's what I call a budget airline!"

"This is the last time I let you handle our vacation plans, you cheapskate."

"Once again, how little did you pay for this room?"

"Rome was great – aside from the roaming fees."

"For an extra charge, your flight can come with angst and insecurity."

Europe on $5000 a day.

Excess Baggage: Many hotels, inspired by the airlines are gouging their guests by adding 'resort fees' to the room rates.

"I know what the airlines charge to check a bag is outrageous, but. . ."

Ticket machine costing an arm and a leg.

Andy's first airplane experience was marred by his grandmother's stinginess

Of course, Hal rented a car with economy gps.