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"What are you watching?"

"You have to admire their honesty."

Time for today's dose of emotional manipulation...

"Lassie, go get help!" "Oh Timmy you idiot! Not again!"

"That concludes our broadcast day. Go to bed."

The Old Time Television Channel

Talk shows are great. Listen shows are even better.

Day two of our series: America's sleeping pill addiction. My guest, pillhead Rudy Park. I'm not a pillhead. Come clean. Admit the obvious truth. What truth? Rush Limbaugh made you do it! A political pundit never misses an opportunity. You got hooked only after O'Reilly harassed you.

"I wanted a partner... I got a co-host."

"It's the great pumpkin's psychotic uncle Mitch, Charlie Brown."

'What TV show do frog princes go on ...?...'

"I had a lovely evening talking trash with you."

Night Life: L.A.

"...Looks like nothing but snow on TV tonight..."

'Well, kids -- I guess it all started to fall apart when they canceled 'Seinfeld'....'

Huawei Five-O

Talkshow Scheduling Dept. I scheduled a guest how a book advocating a strong military position. You booked a hawk who's hawking a book!

'The way I see it, with all the talk shows out there, nobody needs a wife!'

"I've seen your latest project and I must say, it really stinks. I mean, it is utterly putrid. It totally reeks."

"I'm sorry, could you repeat that? I neglected to talk over you."

'He's got a lot of talent and everything, but I just don't think he's cut out for talk radio.'

The Bronze Age of Television

"And now...here to spew his unique brand of unhinged babble and utter nonsense, let's welcome my guest..."

"You won't find Miss Miriam Hirschman an easy nut to crack, Mr. Leno."

Sally Jessy Raphael

'When I was your age, 'classic episodes' were called repeats.'

"He goes through the TV listings deleting all the 'trash' I like."

"Your case has been turned down by Oprah, but we're appealing to Sally Jessy Raphael."

the Morning Joe team.

'We now pause for technical difficulties....'

Tonight's Talk Out Topic is non-verbal communication

Koko and Trump

TV SALES, 'Will the violence chip block out Joy Behar?'

David Letterman

'We'll need a bigger studio- Rosie wants to interview Rush Limbaugh.'