Transport Driver Gifts

'I heard the driver say that he was off to Edinburgh, so I thumbed a lift...'

Thru versus Through Traffic

'So what's it like riding in first class?'

Steep Hill, Slippery When Wet, Watch for Cars Going Faster Than You.

GAS PRICES AT PUMP

"Don't wait up. I'll be working late again tonight."

"Why do they call it rush hour when no one goes anywhere?"

A man in a car waits for a large herd of cows to cross the road; once they have crossed he finds a cow sitting in the passenger seat of his car.

Same Day Delivery: "I wish!"

Music to drive ( others mad) to...

'So much for your new Satnav!'

A 'Falling Rock' and a 'Deer Crossing' zone.

"Yeah, I'm moonlighting. It's a living."

Old Lady in shoe driving a footie (sock) car.

"When I grow up, I don�t know whether to be a stunt amn or a train driver"

Some cars need a backseat steering wheel.

"Bob! Your manure's here!"

How Amazon was invented

A Quiet Rebuke.

'Heirloom Tiffany Lamp Delivery. I Brake for Everything.'

"Ralph's smart car not only drives better than he does, it also works better. So we fired him and hired the car."

'Are we broke yet?'

Acme. Breakable prop transporter.

'Yes, I am impressed at how fast you got here, but where's my pizza?'

"In my own country I didn't drive a taxi."

Yes, That Was The Exit

Bumper stickers: 'Keep on Truckin''; 'Keep on Trunkin''.

I always play the GPS through the backseat speakers. That's were I'm used to receiving instructions.

Lanes Closed for the Hell of It

Sister Cities

'I hate to tell you this, but enlightenment just isn't for commuters.'

'If the GPS has to tell you, 'No, we're not there yet' one more time...'

"Gazelle's pizza! Delivered fast and delicious... Um, you guys aren't interested in pizza are you!?"

"When the slowest car in the fast lane don't go any slower than the fastest car in the slow lane."

"What are you doing? It's Halloween. Not leaving your deliveries to the last minute this year?"