Transcriber Pillows

"Of course he's smiling. He's getting $15,000 to give a lecture on free speech."

"Oh, I'll be bi-partisan alright, punishing both sides of the aisle."

"On a more positive note the guidance we’ve published on the services we can’t provide is published in 37 different languages."

"And the last little piggy cried, 'Oui, oui, oui' all the way home."

Solicitor speaks legal jargon and has a translator who tells client: 'You haven't a hope!'

"'I don't want war'. . . well, wither our translation program is broke or this president has a strange kind of humor!"

Campaign for Plain English

"You haven't got dyslexia- the instructions are in polish."

"How long will we, the descendants of wolves, be content with table scraps and belly rubs?"

"You and your, 'why bother to learn another language. Everyone in the known universe speaks, Zarconian'!"

"Excellent, excellent. A fine blend of truths, half-truths, and blatant falsehoods."

Political convention

"...and before you embark upon life's journey, could one of you help me with my laptop?"

"If Google Translate is correct, they want our women and our cattle."

Dialogue

'Complete sentences?? Jeez, how verbose can you get?'

'Look dear, he's writing political speeches.'

"More rescue efforts, less screenplay."

She - Interpreter - He.

'It's a novel based on a movie adapted from a magazine article that was inspired by a video game.'

Passed over at the Inaugural Poetry Audition

"It lost a little something in translation."

Henry the amazing talking dog.

Revival Meeting - Simultaneous translation of all talking in tongues.

Archeologist Deciphers Limerick Heiroglyphs

'It's the essence of springtime. You're really enjoying it.'

"For just one monkey in front of one typewriter you've come up with some amazing stuff."

Information...political rhetoric

'I won't lower myself to the level of my opponent.'

'Everyone distrusts spin. . . so let's go back to old-fashioned lying.'

"But I won't bore you with the all too familiar story of a dictator's rise to absolute power,"

Jorge Luis Borges