Training Champ Pillows

'It's no use ... I'll never catch anyone. I can't even catch my breath.'

'Dr Hodges, here, is from England and he's been observing us for 14 years. Mr Ferrell, an American, has been here only 3 weeks. Monique Corveu, from Paris, has practically been living with us for about nine years...'

"If it doesn't happen on Facebook, it didn't happen."

A kangeroo and it's baby read books about understanding each other.

Examinations.

Make up your mind. Next exit 500 miles.

The First Day Back

"Oh please, go on, just for the weekend."

"You bet I had it mounted, it gave me the best fight of my life."

PE teacher teaching football tactics. Boy sat in corner with dunce cap.

'Every single piece of homework handed in this morning - there couldn't have been much on TV last night!'

Monkey casino study.

"Deal! I'll introduce you to Dian Fossey and you'll introduce me to Jane Goodall!"

At 4 years old most kids can say easy straightforward sentences.

"Honey, your head's through the armhole again."

"I'm ready. Are you ready? Let the billing begin!"

Father's Day

The art of fishing.

Traffic warden directing people in the gym.

Nature Scents Research Department.

'Honey, can you believe we share 99% of our DNA with chimps!?'

"Before this goes any farther, you should know that I have kids, and I'm old, and I live in a shoe."

"At the moment I'm afraid we have learning difficulties..."

'Hey, I just noticed something. So you know what you get if you cover the 'c' in potato chips? Potato hips, isn't that funny?'

Healthy eating centre - keep off the grease.

"'Wash the Car'? Isn't that nepotism?"

Little known evolutionary steps.

'That's it Ma'am: Your VCR is set and programmed... You don't need to be an Alpha Male to work it out...'

'So now will you take my advice and lose some weight?'

'It's so hot you could fry an egg white on the sidewalk.'

Buffing Cars.

'School's out... the adventure begins!'

Don couldn't figure it. His aftershave had worked great for that guy on tv

"Wow, human DNA is so close to ours! Pity they're just missing perfection by a few percentage points..."