Train Travel Storyteller Gifts

'...We apologise for the delay and disruption to your pain awareness experience, oops, journey.'

'What zip code are we in now?'

'Hold on, I'll get the camera.'

Cash Machines From Across the Land

'You want a quick read? How about this one: 'Memoirs of an Amnesic'?'

"Legs together, David -- You're hamspreading again."

"Could you tell me how to get to cedar grove, New Jersey? I want to see where my grandfather was born."

Columbus Discovers that when Exploring, It's Not Such A Great idea to Bring The Family Along.

Airplane food

Lenin, Anticipating His Arrival at Finland Station, Sees His Baggage Taken Off at Beloostrov.

"And so another trip comes to an end...with family brought closer together by a shared experience."

'Mom! Do they have traffic lights and stop signs in the sky?'

A white collar cow.

"Cancel the trip. The cook didn't get a visa."

Face it, Bob, we're lost. Welcome to Faceitbobwe'relost pop. 2.

'At least, Men point cameras at you these days: In my day, they pointed guns!'

Rail travel - the environmental alternative (that sometimes doesn't allow bikes)

"During our vacation my wife and I went to Paris while our suitcases went to Rome and Athens."

When travelling with her cat by plane, train, or bus, dawn always ensured no one would bother them.

When the Job Market Shifts, Always Remember That It's All Your Fault

'My husband, Bill, works at the airport - I still haven't opened my birthday presents from three years ago.'

'We don't keep cash on the premises.'

"This next song is about a trip to Vermont. It's called 'This is the whitest state I've ever seen—wow!'"

Welcome to Yosemite, Hell on Earth!

"If you look at Lexington Avenue, it is anyone's guess what's happening on the 6 train. Moving on to Broadway, I can tell you that the N and R Lines may or may not be running smoothly, while the Eighth Avenue A and C are, as always, a complete mystery."

Nativity Scene on the Underground

"Flight time is approximately 3 seconds and - I won't lie to you folks - it's a bit choppy up there."

The aviation experts come out to play

Commuter doing some gardening on the train

"Who wants to go first?"

"Excuse me... I think you're in my seat."

Monster Souvenir

'...so then I said 'your camera is stealing my soul' and he said 'I'm so sorry - how can I possibly repay you?''

Traveling abroad from Cuba...

Caravan and Humpback Bridge