Train Track Trekker T-Shirts

'We have to shorten all depot platforms, we misconvernted inches into centimeters and designed the train too wide.'

"Frank and Sheila finally get off the beaten path."

Camping.

Nature Lovers

School trip little porters.

Future Tents

Music producers.

Bigfoot tracks...

'We can probably make Mars in one day.'

'How come they know where we are when we don't.'

"Does the No. 1 stop here and does that go to Penn Station and can I get a train there to Philadelphia and then how do I get to Walnut Street?"

"It's one mile as the crow flies, ten miles as the lost hiker bushwhacks."

Gym: Back and Forth or Going Nowhere.

"Well, it certainly explains why everyone's so nice!"

'I need to lose enough pounds to take a thirty-five meal cruise!'

"Hey. . . in use!"

"Why did you just dump my kiwi-colada smoothie on my head?" "I'm glad you (huff) asked." "Studies (huff) show that sitting all (huff) day long behind a desk leads (huff) to obesity, sickness, (huff) toe-swelling (huff) and an early, (huff) excruciating (huff) death." "So more (huff) and more (huff) office workers are using (huff) standing desks (huff) with treadmills." "Have you ever (huff) tried handing someone (huff) a smoothie while running (huff) on a treadmill?" "They walk. ...walk."

"The gods really love tight buns."

'Uh, we do have tenure, don't well?

"Courtney: Raised by hamsters"

Hurdles with Steps

Speed enforced by really slow walkers.

Have you seen the other tent pole?

'Says here that if you meet a bear in the woods, never try to outrun it!'

'I got the idea from the parks department.'

A woman rides a treadmill as she chases a cookie jar on a refridgerator.

Yeoman of the Guard

Champagne area.

"I thought this was a little heavier than usual."

Mountaintop Dessert

Stuck in the stile.

Forget The Diet And Bake Zum Pies!

Woods: caution slippery when elm.

"Ah...the perfect balance between man and nature."

Lost again! I hope you kept a diary of your trip!