Trailblazing Communicator Pillows

What, you've never heard of Skype?

"Can I borrow the car keys?"

Hey, calm down --- Now, what did you say again?

The writer: something who devotes a lifetime of solitude to the same of communication.

'Complete sentences?? Jeez, how verbose can you get?'

Ninedency: A budding tendency

'...honestly I just feel like we don't communicate like we used to!'

Direct Marketing...

"Dad's got a promotion. How can now mute middle management."

"I'm fascinated by body language."

I'm not sure which, but he's just invented either writing or vandalism. (Published originally on Feb. 11, 2011.)

Target your message

"Mom, come quick. Dad's in a stupor."

Wordplay: Export.

'I sort of thought your presentation was going to be in powerpoint.'

"Well, I've emailed, faxed, and phoned Dobson. Maybe I should just walk down the hall and talk to him..."

'Can't we handle this through more impersonal channels like text messaging?'

"Wow! That's some PowerPoint presentation."

"Abbreviations here, abbreviations there, and one is more incomprehensible than the next!"

'Uh, yeah, the picture resolution is great.'

Teacher getting the childrens attention by pretending to be on television.

"Those are wonderful insights jack but we're, Looking for actual ideas."

You can't fool all of the people all of the time, especially with our advertising budget.

'Of course, this social contract will have to remain hypothical until someone invents writing.'

"I've learned to give up when I hear Brooklyn in your voice."

"I think I know what your problem is. Not enough PR."

Give way - 'Oh, alright then...'

By teaching the parrot a few key phrases, Marilyn no longer needs to nag her kids.

Time for speeches

We can do ANYTHING if we all work TOGETHER.

'Charles is a linguist. He speaks three language...golf, baseball and football.'

"I can't remember, did you text me, call me, tweet me, email me, or just tell me about it?"

"See! Thousands of new listeners."

When it comes to texting, she's all thumbs.'

"I'm not great at communication, but my little buddy is."