Trail Mix Tasters T-Shirts

"Up here! Beef jerky, trail mix, energy bars!"

'Eight years old, huh? If it's so good, why didn't somebody drink it eight years ago?'

'Or we could just ask her what kind of dog it is.'

"Our fresh seasonal hand-crafted brews contain a full serving of spring vegetables."

"The soup of the day is pineapple with a hint of rum."

Fly Tastings: 'Notice that hint of dog fur and then let that full bodied garbage finish unfold.'

"We have three house blends: 'One More Chance', 'Forget About It' or 'I'll See You In Fun Court'."

Complementary Beverages

A new career for George W. Bush: taster in a pretzel factory.

Ethnic food springing out of a menu.

'I don't actually want to learn so much that I become a wine buff - just a wine snob!'

"Hints of migrant workers on the nose."

"Wine not?"

"One man's dirty water is another man's Earl Grey."

Chocolate Munchies. Only 100 calories...' awesome!' - '' - 'Runchy! Rurrgh!!' - '' - 'Oh, hold on. 100 calories per Munchie' - '' -

The race against gravity with an ice cream!

'He has been asked to review a new dog treat ... '

"Column A are things they said would kill you ten years ago but are now considered totally good for you. Column B are things they currently think will kill you."

"Have you tried the David and Goliath cocktail?"

"It's new. It's Perrier flavored vodka."

Two boys rehearsing,

"It seems an ungrateful and disrespectful monster has taken over Baldo's brain."

'Well Cookie. . . it looks like some horse droppings, cattle droppings, some tumbleweeds, barbed wire and parts from an old wagon. . . What the heck do you call it??'

"Man, I love roughing it out here... but this trail mix is making my fingers sticky!"

'How about a few of the pretty pink and yellow ones today, dear.'

"Come to the dark side."

Ice Cream Cone Ladder

"Man, I love roughing it out here...but this trail mix is making my fingers sticky!"

"What I like most about this is the trail mix."

Trail Mix: Contains No Less than 10% Actual Trail.

"Man, I love roughing it out here. . . but this trail mix is making my fingers sticky!"

Dieter's 'To-Do' list...

'Hey - these things are pretty good!'

Heirloom Hot Dogs.

"After last night, I'm a changed man -- I changed from scotch to vodka."