Trail Snack Enthusiast T-Shirts

Trail Mix: Contains No Less than 10% Actual Trail.

Tartine

'My body has rejected every diet I've tried.'

Rage.

"I just want you to know that promotion, this office, and those Luna bars were mine!"

"I'm not eating cookies before dinner. I'm having cookies for dinner!"

Super Heroes.

'Take of the fruit and eat . . . Well, peanuts actually.'

Love is when you watch television together.

"Note the spike here, when the state legalized marijuana."

"Funny. My girlfriend said the same thing."

'At least he isn't into drugs.'

Holiday Supplies

'You'll enjoy our staff meetings. We always begin and end with the product.'

'These hors d'oeuvres are real slop, and I mean that in the best sense.'

"We'd better stock up on TV snacks in the event of war."

How The Sausage Is Eaten

Lioness Shops for Snacks.

Medical Marijuana Dispensary / Medical Cheez Doodles Dispensary

"Goal!"

"We serve danishes because that's just how I roll!"

Sheltering in place.

Back in 5 minutes!

"I'm you from the future! Or the past. I've completely lost track of time."

'You do realise that's pot pourii?'

"Yaffle Pass Elevation 11,990 ft Continental Divide"

"He's an indoor cat."

How lazy people decide what to eat

A new career for George W. Bush: taster in a pretzel factory.

'Prepare to meet your maker!'

"Let's see, we bought the giant pop corn, tow giant sodas, and a big box of candy. . . we were lucky the megaplex's loan department was open!"

Cinemuck

"I didn't know they made a 'Sitbit'"

"We missed the meeting, but there might be a couple of the little muffins left."