Traffic Updates Pillows

'He brought along that short-wave radio just so he can listen to the commuter traffic reports from home.'

"Every motorway in the country is clear except the southbound M3 which will remain at a standstill for the rest of the day."

Thru versus Through Traffic

Doug had trouble getting home at a decent hour.

'Why don't you just pull over and let them pass already?!?'

The inhabitants of the jungle get tied up in rush hour traffic.

Unpopular Street Signs: Road Work Behind, Speed Jump Ahead, Good Luck, Slow Distracted Adults.

"Why do they call it rush hour when no one goes anywhere?"

"Do you remember, Peg—are we on our way out or on our way back?"

New Road Signs to Watch For:

'It's not meant to be a fold up bike, but the truck driver I held up for seven miles thought otherwise.'

'Wow, these lights stay on the red cycle for a very long time.'

'I think we took a wrong turn between the seventh and eight holes.'

'I beat the 5 o'clock rush... I leave work at noon!'

"When the slowest car in the fast lane don't go any slower than the fastest car in the slow lane."

Reserved space is reserved for a dinner table.

One way only.

Lot for people who don't know how to park.

The Forever Stamp

Id/Ego/Superego.

'Guess they're still fixing the street.'

"If find people express themslves more freely in traffic jams."

A doorman fires a gun into the air.

"Were you using your mobile?" "How could I possibly? I've had my hands full eating and smoking!"

Cake Walk.

Moses comes to Los Angeles.

'It's a slow trap.'

Santa's a Traffic Reporter during his off season.

'Ahh...I see you travelling far and wide on a long fruitless mission but you still can't find a town centre parking space this Christmas...'

Have Horns Venn

'Mostly we just block traffic.'

I can't believe what I see phobia. 'This is your new flying traffic reporter. I think I'm dreaming.'

'Small acts of kindness, officer, can go a long way toward making this world a better place.'

'That's not the speed limit! It's the number of cameras in the area!'

'This is your third speeding ticket in a week. Sure your horse didn't get into some genetically modified hay?'