Traffic Ticket Collector Gifts

'No Sir, it's not a prescription for your 'weird, dizzy turns where everything slows down and you have to go faster to compensate'.'

'Sorry kid, but rules are rules!'

'Relax, he's just doing his job. Try not to bite his head off.'

'It's my birthday. I'm giving a free cup of coffee to everyone that gets a ticket.'

"Do you know why I stopped you, sir?"

CartoonStock Upload"I don't know what made the officer think I was speeding."

"You're not a bad dog for driving. You're a bad dog for not wearing a seat belt."

"He's upset I'm getting 36,000 points for speeding in one night."

"... Have you passed?... Well, just let me move these five traffic violation tickets that you picked up, out of the way and I'll check your score."

"Do you, Paul Bergerson, take this traffic ticket..."

"Don't blame me for the broken brake light, officer! Blame the guy I stole this lemon from!"

'A fine? It's not as though I ran over more than one building inspector.'

Speed Checked By Bored Bureaucrats.

"So, where's the fire? And brimstone?"

Cop says to bull, 'I understand that the red light made you angry, but you still have to stop.'

'A fine? For running over one lousy union buster?'

'Did you see the sign back there, dangerous bends? I saw it. That's why I drove through it as quickly as I could.'

I've stopped you so often I've decided to give you a season ticket!

Car parked illegally has 'divorce attorney on call' sign in window.

'You're in a red state now, pal!'

'You don't have a license and registration, do you?'

'Ignore it! It's just some of the local kids trying to get in for free.'

'I'm lost, did you happen to see a lady without a boy like me ?'

'Do you know how fast you were going?'

Tolls: Must have exact change and tails up.

'Caution Speed Bump Ahead.'

Car leaving highway crashes through 'EXIT HERE' sign.

'Mom! Do they have traffic lights and stop signs in the sky?'

Ticket - At the Theatre in the Hay Market - The Authors Benefit Pasquin.

"Sorry, eighty is not the new sixty-five."

"So why do you think it's so hard to let others in?"

"It's a narrative I didn't intend."

If traffic signs were used in everyday life...

"You inherited an extra toe from your father and didn't pay the inheritance tax on it."

"Oh look, that police car is chasing someone! Let me get out of his way. Hmm...he's still behind me. Let me move... That's odd....he's still behind me. I'll move over another lane."