Traffic Law Gifts

All-way stops.

'Have a heart, officer... the little mite is starving!'

Well, my license hadn't expired when I drove into this cloverleaf! Police.

'This is my finest hour!'

No Ewe Turn.

Steep Hill, Slippery When Wet, Watch for Cars Going Faster Than You.

Dog Crossing

'Caution Speed Bump Ahead.'

"Mr. Evans, it's a speeding ticket. You can't plea insanity."

'So then. The handsome p.c. noticed that the tax disc on Cinderella's pumpkin carriage was well out of date.'

'Driving without a flag?'

At the gallery of Fine Art.

"According to the breathalyzer, the wine definitely represents your blood."

'It was HIS fault, he was doing the SPEED LIMIT!'

'Can't you read?'

'...so until you get your own place - you live by our rules!'

Deer Crossing.

Watch out for the traffic rules! Especially in other countries!

'You were nagging your husband all over the road. I'll need to see your marriage license.'

"For your information, officer, I was not ‘texting’ – I was reviewing candidate applications for fellowship grants!"

"Speed bumps have reduced stampede injuries."

"You were doing the speed limit. I found that suspicious."

'On the Highway of Life, Broderick Crawford is always pulling me over.'

"I believe you to be over our new drink-drive limits, and require you to blow into this..!"

'Officer, I thought road signs were just mere suggestions.'

'Good thing your car was stationary when it hit me.'

How you can tell that the environmentalists won the elections...

The Automatic Policeman

'Sorry kid, but rules are rules!'

"What's the rush? He'll still be dead when you get there."

"I'm giving you a fine for illegal parking. I don't care if this is a traffic jam."

'So how do you like the new job?' - 'Not bad, better than walking the streets.'

'A metal plate in your head does not qualify as a helmet.'

"Do you know why I stopped you, sir?"

"This will maintain your rebellious image in states with helmet laws."