Traditional Songs Gifts

'Knock off the E-I-E-I-O over there, McDonald, or I'm calling the law!'

"This is a lovely old song that tells of a young woman who leaves her cottage, and goes off to work. She arrives at her destination, and places some solid NHHS in a flask containing 0.50 atm ofammonia, and attempts to determine the pressures of ammonia and hydrogen sulide when equilibrium is reached."

Santa Claus's wife beats the soot out of his beard.

Night of the Latkes

"O young, naive one...you must know the golden rule of the kitchen. To avoid the mother of all disrespects...never criticize the cooking of a family elder."

Mozart on a computer,

Annie, the Reptile version: 'The sun will come out tomorrow! Tomorrow! You will sun yourself tomorrow!'

'Henrietta is so self-confident.'

Full English Breakfast.

"Charming, absolutely charming."

'Fred is a social conservative -- he believes in slow food and heavy beer.'

"Yes, in the jungle, the mighty jungle, the lion sleeps tonight, but he snores!"

"Yes, 'the lion sleeps tonight', I know the tune, but it means it's had a good feed during the day, which is not really a good thing..."

'Row, row, row your boat, Gently down the stream...'

'I hate to tell you... it's not 'amber waves of gain'.'

Two people play the guitar and harmonica.

Keyboard in Front of a Organ

Bayonne Festival

"I like a Gershwin tune. How about you?"

Woman protesting to Free-Kirk pastor about a church organ

'Stop Hamish! You're playing ma haggis!'

"I got this new hat for when we do the collection at the end."

"It's my pet mouse, Elvis. He was caught in a trap."

'The King replaced me with easy listening!'

'My parents are trying to wean me off instant gratification.'

Soldiers Ball at Huntsville, Alabama. Dancing the Virginia Reel

'It's girl power - she sacked her manager.'

Soto

'Do you have any Cheese and Pickle?

"It's steak and chips, it is what the ploughman had for lunch!"

'Boy I hate children: They sing 'Eeny Meeny Miney Mo' and then catch me by the toe...'