Toy Store Clerk Prints

'My barbie's got a hot date she needs some slag-rags.'

"Christmas - what a fuss eh?"

'Sorry sir,but we can't just take your word that the boots leak'

"It's felt to be his most thought provoking work."

Perks Featured in Vacancy at Toy Company

"So, do you want balls that only go up, or ones that only go down?"

Toys were me: lessons learned never growing up

"The suit - it's rejecting your body."

'You say 'boo' she wets herself.'

"Not much in the way of loot, but we got a ton of store credit."

"Would you like to try them out?"

"What do you mean, it's not an educational toy? I'd have to learn to ride it!"

'Take it easy, the textbooks will be here. It's only August 30.'

'No, I'm afraid we don't have calendars in dog-years.'

"Do you have anything else by the same author?"

Self-Improvement, Self-Empowerment, Self-Aggrandizement

A man sitting in the grass reading

'This snuff video you sold me just shows people taking snuff.'

Science Books. Do you have any books about Lepidoptera? Yes, and would you like to join "The Book of the Moth Club"?

"Your receipt is also available in a choice of colors."

University Book Store.

'We couldn't give away black-and-white TVs until we started advertising them as having 'non multi-color capability'.'

Jack-in-the-Box Enterprises.

"Because it's got a goddam crack in it, that's why."

"This one's a little more expensive, but she comes with her own reality show."

'There's no fear of him making a Frankenstein's Monster out of this is there?'

"Do you carry any shampoos that have been tested on little kittens?"

Clown applying mustard to balloon hotdog.

'I want to return this wallet. I can't seem to keep any money in it.'

"That One!"

"Would you really want to read a book by a comedian that didn't have wide margins?"

"What's wrong with you? This isn't what I want! Do you know what you're doing? Can you get me a smarter clerk?"

Book Store. Information. In what section would I find guides to government regulations? "Books on Red Tape".

'Does my posterior appear oversized in this?'

Toys Were Me