Toy Expert T-Shirts

Little doctor. Little Quack

'Peter the Flying Hippo is my favorite storybook character without any merchandising tie-ins.'

'Sometimes I worry that I basically wasted my 2's.'

Director/Action Man toy.

Rocking horse

The Rubber Ball Company

"Just because I can deliver toys around the world in one night, doesn't mean I understand the tax code."

"That'll be five bucks."

"Bleeeee! It's plastic."

Rocking Horse

"Werewolves of London..."

Toy plane with pilot eject.

Toy Shops and Educated Children

"So, do you want balls that only go up, or ones that only go down?"

"It's his emotional support animal."

Perks Featured in Vacancy at Toy Company

Child makes a toy and frightens himself.

"Of course I'm bored - my batteries are flat!"

Childlike love

"If we play house, Timmy, we can't live with my parents because..."

'Sharon's into genetic engineering!'

Teddy and friends.

"Graduation day at kite flying school."

'A few years ago all we needed were some people who could hammer and some people who could paint.'

Jack in the box on strike.

"Are you happy with your current ball?"

"It's a fairy simple procedure. We just take out the dead ones and put in two new ones."

What can I play?

'He loves that Lego set we bought for his birthday.'

'It's just like any other doll except this one needs hours of therapy to work normally.'

'The Easter Bunny has started outsourcing to us.'