Tourism Pranksters Pillows

Up Pariscope.

'Santa recalled thousands of toys ― he delivered them to kids who're in fact naughty.'

Retirement homes' 'pill fight'.

'It's called 'cause and effect.' I pound this log and Tarzan goes bananas.'

"Do we have to go to the beach? I think the airline mixed up my luggage."

'I've only come to get my nail back.'

"We can speak freely now. I've encrypted the line."

ABC Diapers. Comfy Tushy Diapers. Now 3 times more absorbent! Note to self: Drink 4 times more juice.

"Not that it's right, but I understand. I was young once and used to sneak out to do crop circle, too."

Tartar sauce.

'Oh, the usual, a postman, a couple of salesmen, a pizza delivery boy, how was your day?'

"Santa's not been happy with your behavior in class and says, get it together or your Christmas won't be merry!"

Someone's going to have to tell him he's adopted...

'I'm sorry, did you say you wanted to try fresh sugarcane.'

'Smoking or non-smoking?'

"'Let's introduce him to a mirror' he said. 'It'll be fun he said'. You call the coroner!"

Monkey dropping apples on Newton's head.

A clown is walking a balloon dog. He is pretending it is weeing on a fire hydrant.

"They said whatever you left in Las Vegas, stays in Las Vegas."

Back to the Holidays

"You're making a complete ass of yourself, Rodney!"

'Let's just keep quiet about this, and maybe some terrorist group will claim credit.'

"I think we both know who did it...."

Santa Claus stuck in a chimney sitting in a hospital emergency room.

"A large donation usually calms him down."

Peniteniary for the terminally silly.

Revenge Of The Tipped Cows

Remember, when we show mommy, we pretend this was your idea, ok?

Children in a Nursery.

"I'm ready to play Hide and go Seek."

'The truth is, Gorillas don't even like bananas...They just love pratfalls.'

"Omnipotent?! I thought you said impotent. And you're out of wished, too."

'No problem Mr. Billings, just drop your shorts and let me take a sniff around there.'

Why clown agents shoul never hide in the WC

'I am unable to find the words to respond to that.'