Tough Competitor Gifts

Rugger.

"So what's this special distracting tactic you've developed?"

Hockey Season.

Danth battle?

Golf Hole at bottom of lake.

The Unsportables: Relay

Al's Diner. Special: Spaghetti. All You Can Eat $3.95. Ernie, don't play with your food unless you're sure you can win.

"My computer beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick-boxing!"

Noughts and crosses hugging and kissing.

"Looks like somebody brought a blanky to a pillow fight."

The Cricketer and the Golfer

'You beat me by two...but with your penalties I beat you by 150!'

Pole jumper about to land on a giant whoopi cushion.

Plane with banner shoots at another.

"Watch these old guys- you can learn a lot."

"I carefully examine the data for March madness brackets and every year I lose to Anita, who picks by uniform colors."

'Now close your eyes and visualize our upcoming softball game against the elm street zen center and kicking their sorry behinds.'

'Make no mistake Wetherall, it's a jungle out there.'

"Calm down, I'm just using the rules of modern competition."

' Love and pole vault'

'By the way, no one has ever beaten me and lived to tell about it.'

Skateboard Olympics.

A Man mixing up his sports.

'Oh, yeah? Well, my dad can pretend to beat up your dad!'

Tug the Toggle

'This information is on a need-to-screw-others basis.'

Later accounts would call it the Greatest Water Battle of All Time,

Oh, yeah? Well, my dad can reach a higher plane of consciousness than your dad!

"Foul!"

"Better - but it was still too obvious when you went for the pine tar under your hat."

'Which club do I use for a hole in one?'

Competitions.

"All As. What did you get?"

Umbrella fight.

Space Hopper Rodeo