Topiary Tinkerer Pillows

Topiary By Numbers

"I'm grounded. I forgot to delete the car's computer history after we did those crop circles on Earth."

"Well, that's created a little order in a world of chaos."

Gardener clipping topiary stairs

"I imagined the Library of Congress would be much bigger."

"This software will cut my workload in half, so I purchased two."

Rejected Titles For The Canadian National Anthem.

"Once I connect with my server over there, I can turn my lamp on and off."

MacGyver's Cat: 'You see, I took your bed and two paper clips and made it my bed.'

"I thought you were making a coffee table?"

"He's on screen saver. Just tap him."

'Roger's busy making a cat-flap in the kitchen.'

Congratulations on your retirement!

'I really can't stay for dessert. Why don't you stay and DVR the rest of the date for me?'

'3-D TV Kit'

'No, you can't play Space Invaders in it.'

FRY's FAMILY - Young Tom was always fiddling around with bits of machinery.

'Sharon's into genetic engineering!'

Sistine Selfie

"Moby Richard by Herman Melville" "Wonderful! Not sure about the title—let's discuss editor."

Filling the Missile Gap

Fur Baby

'Mom! Dad's eating my science fair project!'

'I'm a do-it-yourselfer, but I've never been a done-it-yourselfer...'

Bot Art: After Mary Cassatt

"We think we got some good CT scans, but unfortunately they're encrypted and our I.T. guy is on vacation this week."

"Before automation how did humans endure work?"

"Prove you're not a human Select the squares with a bike Skip"

Fixing the TV.

'But I did study. I guess the software didn't install successfully.'

We've already got one. A hidden microphone in the staff coffee area.

Joys of D.I.Y.

"Never marry an engineer."

'Smith, where exactly did you get your experience in 'Hedge Fund Management'?'

"I think that's one of those annoying flying drones we've been hearing about!"