Tool Shed Tinkerer Gifts

'Close enough?'

Pounding speeds up the computer.

Robot Parts $5

Robots search for people's personal information in the cloud.

'My penmanship has really improved since I got a laser printer.'

The Computer Bore

"I'm grounded. I forgot to delete the car's computer history after we did those crop circles on Earth."

'First you forget logarithms. Then you forget how to do long division. Then the multiplication table begins to go...'

"I haven't a clue what it does, but I don't know I managed without it"

"This software will cut my workload in half, so I purchased two."

Needed Inventions: An Airbag To Protect The Viewer Against A Really Lousy Program.

Painting the Ceiling

"In the whole length and breadth of this world there is no more admirable a spot for a man and his dog to pass the time than the local Home Depot."

Tool Box

"Measure twice, cut once...and curse three times!"

"Once I connect with my server over there, I can turn my lamp on and off."

'They look more up to date than the ones in your tool-box.'

"You've just got to have the biggest and the best, have'nt you?!"

The Gardener's Calendar: Try to Repair It...

Early cyborg.

The Not-So Smart Meter

"I sensed you needed my help. I’m Saint &@!#%&!!, the patron saint of cursing."

"Siri, who’s the fairest of them all?"

'Hon? Did your phone go dead? Hello?'

Gadget geek.

Name one serious woodworker who doesn't use state of the art kit. Thomas Chippendale.

"He's on screen saver. Just tap him."

Sale! Weed Whackers

'I solved the problem of dead zones on my cell phone with a personal satellite,'

Ralph spent his Sundays in the park gathering nuts.

'A cousin to the hammerhead, here we see the allusive, yet, handy, multi-use shark.'

'I suppose you want Polly to forget she heard that.'

"I got a swiss army hook!"

Bicycle sat nav.

'I think I see what's making your funny noise.'