Tool For Tiger Parents T-Shirts

"Push me, Dad. Mozart was pushed."

'Boy, being an endangered species is quite hard: I get weighed, tagged, filmed, recorded and studied by scientists: I have no privacy...'

"Bootsy has welcomed the vacuum robot into our home in her own unique way."

Sober Tooth Tiger

"I'm not kidding: I am feline too and I do love swimming!"

"Beats me. They put up the sign and went to their panic room."

'A vet!! Take Princess to a vet?'

'So much for the 'Eye of the Tiger'.'

"Do you have any books on releasing the tiger within?"

"Listen, I'm still your mother."

"We're having a problem naming him. All the domain names we like are already taken!"

'One small tooth for me...one giant worry for you.'

Sleeping Tiger

'I was interested to see that you're living in a complete pigsty. Ours isn't quite finished yet.'

"I'm Billy's mother, and this is his attorney!"

"Yes, when I was young, I was a golden retriever: I'm more like a silver retriever now..."

'Son, I think you're old enough now to know about the birds and the fleas.'

Pram for baby giraffe

Kitchen Appliances Fed Up With The Baby.

'Dust-mop-baby-jumper.'

"Dad, what is anthropomorphism?"

'I'm getting a tattoo removed just to annoy my parents.'

'You gotta try different things! Sometimes a temper tantrum works best an' somethimes sulking an' sometimes not eating!'

"Hi, Honey—what achievements today?"

'His Mandarin's OK, but he needs extra tuition in differential calculus.'

'Ahhh...'

"The tests have come back and don't show that your bones have any specially beneficial qualities: I don't understand why the poachers are after you..."

"Just Remember, Sweetie - Fight The Biggest One First."

"I just got back from the groomer. Jealous?"

"It's shampoo and conditioner!"

"I take back those awful things I said about them making you wear a doggie sweater...I heard the older woman say something about the cat's pajamas!"

"I told him to come back when he's truly gifted."

Book club is reading about how Chinese parents get results. Good choice. Patty Chu can give the Tiger Mom's insider secrets. I'll remind her. Nuts. She can't come. She's supervising her kid's violin practice. Her secret revealed.

Watch out! Mom is doing her karaoke tiger-mom routine. I'm ready. Teddy! It's time to study harder,

'Boo.'