Tongue-in-cheek Toys Pillows

Strike Action Man.

"First I drink, then I barbecue — that's my secret."

Robinson decided to name him 'Casual Friday'.

Do it yourself books.

Shakespeare's Lost Play: The Taming of the Pooch.

'Economic indicators are down, but cheer up! The history revisionists will turn this into 'the good old days'...'

"It's not just me, Dad. Amazon.com has never made a cent, either."

Shall I be mother?

'I'm fairly certain it's, what we call in the medical profession, a 'snake'.'

'Great now put the company logo on the togas and make the building in back look like the Parthenon.'

Husband / Wife / On The Side

"Hail to thee, blithe spirit!"

"I appreciate you asking for directions. But how reliable is 'Just follow your nose!' from a toucan?"

Having asked for some 'bruisers' to bruise oats for feeding horses, Mr. Haycock gets sent the 'Whitechaple Chicken' and the 'Bayswater Slasher'

'May I recommend the ketchup '06,sir?'

"Seriously...girls have their own language!"

"No Bald Games"

The Cheshire Dog.

"I'm sorry you decided to leave us! I will really miss your wife at our company parties!"

"All our vegetables are well done. It's a return to the old values."

'I wish they hadn't voted out instant replay.'

'This tongue transplant I had with fly paper is great.'

"I bet if it hadn't smoked, it'd still be alive."

"Bitch."

Employees Must Cleanse Palate. ?

"He's busy cross-training. He's drinking with his left hand."

"Come on and pay for the shopping like a man."

"The way I look at it, drinking alcohol may never solve anything. . . but neither did drinking milk!"

Tommy, I have a question for you. I didn't do nothin'. We're missing a scone. Now, no one's accusing you of anything. I swear, you've got the wrong guy. I definitely didn't take a scone when you went to check email because I was super hungry. You have the right to remain silent. I did it!

"It's a novelty t-shirt me and the boys designed, Mrs. Patterson!"

As you know by now know, we received dozens of replies to our request for suggestions to rename Rudy Park's generation. Today, we announce the third-place runners-up. That selection goes to a handful of readers who deemed Rudy's peer group Generation E for entitlement or entitled. Thoughts? I thought he E referred to easy to saddle with the deficit, you cheapskate curmudgeons! What do you think of that?! Solid retort. But we though enough to give it third place. Tomorrow: Our runners-up are anno

'The gentleman would like to buy you a drink if you'll follow him on twitter, and I'd be really grateful if you didn't explain what that means.'

'And this is a braille message for the blind.'

Why do you have an empty beer can hanging from the ceiling? Because it's hard to find mistletoe in April.

"The Lord works in mysterious ways and likes to be paid in small unmarked bills"