Tongue-in-cheek Disciplinarian T-Shirts

"Don’t you dare talk to your father in all caps young lady!"

"First I drink, then I barbecue — that's my secret."

No-Work Orange

Robinson decided to name him 'Casual Friday'.

"Microwave to replace gas or oil central heating?" "Yes. Think how cheap it is to microwave a cup of tea!"

Nobody mourned Sir Dad-Joke.

'Don't worry boss, it's probably archaic!'

'Economic indicators are down, but cheer up! The history revisionists will turn this into 'the good old days'...'

"It's not just me, Dad. Amazon.com has never made a cent, either."

'I'm fairly certain it's, what we call in the medical profession, a 'snake'.'

Husband / Wife / On The Side

"I appreciate you asking for directions. But how reliable is 'Just follow your nose!' from a toucan?"

"Hail to thee, blithe spirit!"

'Great now put the company logo on the togas and make the building in back look like the Parthenon.'

'This service has been brought back in house and outsourced numerous times, I propose that as the contract is up for renewal again we consider 'shaking it all about''

The Three Doctors.

Having asked for some 'bruisers' to bruise oats for feeding horses, Mr. Haycock gets sent the 'Whitechaple Chicken' and the 'Bayswater Slasher'

"Seriously...girls have their own language!"

'On the plus side, you won't have to worry about me getting into an expensive college.'

'May I recommend the ketchup '06,sir?'

The Cheshire Dog.

Burke and Hare and Hare

"I'm sorry you decided to leave us! I will really miss your wife at our company parties!"

"No Bald Games"

"He's busy cross-training. He's drinking with his left hand."

"Come on and pay for the shopping like a man."

As you know by now know, we received dozens of replies to our request for suggestions to rename Rudy Park's generation. Today, we announce the third-place runners-up. That selection goes to a handful of readers who deemed Rudy's peer group Generation E for entitlement or entitled. Thoughts? I thought he E referred to easy to saddle with the deficit, you cheapskate curmudgeons! What do you think of that?! Solid retort. But we though enough to give it third place. Tomorrow: Our runners-up are anno

'The little woman hide the remote control, and I've lost ten pounds looking for it!'

'The gentleman would like to buy you a drink if you'll follow him on twitter, and I'd be really grateful if you didn't explain what that means.'

"I have no luck with women. Am I racist for blaming someone who wasn't born here?"

R.I.P Seth Grimthorp

Why do you have an empty beer can hanging from the ceiling? Because it's hard to find mistletoe in April.

"I wish I'd said that!"

'Get with it, Ralph! Trophies are meaningless, when everyone gets one!'

'And this is a braille message for the blind.'