Toilet Ponderer Pillows

'If they don't want me drinking out of the toilet, what's this roll of napkins for?'

Wally Begins research for his thesis entitled "who's a good dog?"

Beginning Yarder.

Next Time-Portal 5 Miles...

"What's an imagination? It was something kids used to enjoy before they invented video games."

'As you know, some of us can't keep up with the pace of new technology.'

Progress?

'Just one God? - But won't he be outnumbered?'

'Cosmetic surgery.'

'Dang it, nothing but junk mail'

"It looks as if Bodecker's project has gotten completely out of hand."

'It must cost a small fortune to dry clean that suit.'

'Well that's a load off my mind. Osborne's cutting the 50p tax rate.'

'It seems like a good invention now, but someday there'll be millions of these things, all crashing into each other.'

'Does my posterior appear oversized in this?'

CREEPY AF AI

'Do you ever wonder about this whole 'money' thing?'

Six months later they would be sharing the Nobel Prize, but for now all they could do was stare in amazement at what they had discovered...two incredibly well preserved specimens from the styrofoam age.'

'Can I trust a Doctor whose prescriptions have absolutely no side effects?'

'The mind-body problem is best expressed in the formulation...OOf!'

"If I become 'Born again', can I fudge a bit on my age?"

'To be or not to be . . . contingent on royal funding.'

A tree falls in a forest and no one is there to hear it.

Fruits and vegetables

Enter Exit - Circle of Life.

Man has drug cabinet labelled 'Safe Drugs' and 'Not Sure Drugs'.

'Wait! Tell me again about the 'excessive gas and oily discharge'?'

Mailwoman looks at mailboxes marked Mail - Spam.

'Taking anti-depressants is getting me down...'

What Is This Crap?